I’ve become frighteningly aware of the fact that there are more than a few things that I can’t pull off wearing anymore, at my age.
–Tee shirts with humorous text…unless they’re *really* subtle. Shame because I’ve practically lived in them the past decade, having been a graphic designer. It’s like a uniform.
–Anything from the 80’s revival. I totally understand what was meant by: “If you wore it for real the first time around, you are too old to be wearing it now.” I SO want to do the pointy flats, skinny jeans and slouchy horizontal striped sweaters, but it’s just a TERRIBLE look for someone like me.
–Levi’s 646 big bells. I love the cut of these and they are much more flattering than 501s, but alas I’m too old to try and evoke the look of the stoners from my high school. The bells are just too big (14″ i think?) and I can’t take all that swishing around down there when I’m trying to dash across Market street to catch the BART. Maybe I can find a compromise that is less extreme?
–Blue eyeliner. I guess I’m sticking to neutrals now (brown, black). You’d think that after all these years I’d clue into the fact that no one is going to think my eyes are actually blue. You’ll be happy to know that I DID give up the teal eye shadow that went along with it, years ago.
–Ironic dressing in general. One of my favorite things to do back in my fashionista years working at the Gap (where everything hinged on what you were wearing) was to take the dorkiest item and with a big dose of attitude, wear the hell out of it. I was young, fearless, and, um much smaller then. I remember thinking from the fashion models we worked with that they could make the ugliest thing look cool…because they wore it like it WAS cool. Alas, I can’t do that anymore. Dorky items continue to look dorky on me now, and that makes me both dorky and embarrassed.